lost surfer, Duke Williams

Big Man on a Little Stick

lost surfer, Duke Williams

rides a 5 day tsunami

to Gilligan’s Island

and back—

to amnesia

 

Blue Juice snake

barrel Point Break

the surf guitar moans

Dick Dale’s Del Tones

Jan and Dean swerve

on “Dead Man’s Curve”

XKE or Stingray, dude

give me a Woody in the nude

The Beach Boys bark

but their Pet Sounds

are so clean, dog

 

Gidget on the North Shore

gimme more, gimme more

toes on the nose, Daddy-O

Ride The Wild Surf, bro

make me laugh there, Chicken Joe

How To Stuff A Wild Bikini, yo

Annette, she’ll know; she’ll know

Big Wednesday’s on

as Soul Surfer dawns

ocean giant spawns

a beast so sick

it’s 409 epic

 

I’m stoked to surf smut

The Endless Summer but

Beach Blanket Bingo is a bummer

no bikinis in this sand, Max

so drop a knee on your sex wax

firing on one cylinder

Blue Hawaii bender

as Eric Von Zipper said,

“— beach bums is bums”

Frankie and Fabian are dead

Big Kahuna distant drums— wail

bail, bail! they shout

wipe out, WIPE OUT!

Dad, that was rad

 

Big Man on a Little Stick

lost surfer, Duke Williams

rides a 5 day tsunami

to Gilligan’s Island

and back—

to amnesia

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Bullitt 1968

Frank Bullitt 1968

king cool is Steve McQueen

blue eyes bleed intensity

Mustang fastback green

blonde screen idol in his prime

just the uber-action man

doing most of his own stunts

driving hard in old San Fran

 

mob witness from Chicago

his name is Johnny Ross

will he testify? not likely, man

he needs protection, boss

Bullitt’s got the job’s attention

Vaughn’s Chalmers is the politician

— and he’s your antagonistic prick

Don Gordon is Delgetti— understated slick

Cap’n Sam is Oakland, Cap’n with a crew cut

the mob assassins are comin’ to kill but

Bullitt, he’s a won’t-let-go-nut

his call of duty, manic

Embarcadero door kicked in

a Winchester pump is pumpin’

sawed-off shotgun bloody blasts

sexy sixties soundtrack jazz

screeching tires with pizzazz

 

“How bad?”

“Bad. He’s got a bleeder”

“Frank, the chain was off. He unlocked the door”

“What are his chances?”

“No more than 50-50”

“Shotgun and a back-up man. Professionals”

“Play it by the book from now on”

“Does Chalmers run this case or do I?”

“Excuse me, sir? Are you the policeman that hasn’t eaten?”

“Yes, ma’am!”

“Doctor, there’s a cardiac arrest in I.C.U.”

“You work your side of the street and I’ll work mine”

 

shawl collar sweater, skinnies and desert boots

is Steve’s Bullitt gear apparel

a patient named Johnny Ross

has disappeared and, well

his chart’s gone missing, boss

hitman strolling hospital hallways

sawed-off shotgun trench coat flair

“Is he about 5′ 10″, gray hair?”

Bullitt says into the phone

“Yes”

jazzy pursuit in the basement zone

bad guy gets away

Norman Fell has the skinniest tie I’ve ever seen

Robert Vaughn’s shoes click and clack

on the hospital floor so clean

 

morning brings green onions

six frozen dinners stacked

and a stolen newspaper

saucy Jacqueline Bisset

plays Cathy, Frank’s squeeze

with her English sensitivities

in her blue pajama top

eating her Wheaties

“Can I get you something?”

 

Frank Bullitt 1968

king cool is Steve McQueen

blue eyes bleed intensity

Mustang fastback green

blonde screen idol in his prime

just the uber-action man

doing most of his own stunts

driving hard in old San Fran

 

“Habeus Corpus, duly noted”

“Now listen to me, Lieutenant”

click

“Alright, nail him. I want him written off”

“No problem”

 

Robert Duval has two bits

he is the Sunshine cab driver

“Two”

“Two what?”

“Calls. He called twice, the second was long distance”

“How do you know it was long distance?”

“He put in a lot of change”

 

nice elbow patches on your sport coat, Frank

get in your Mustang GT

the bad guys in black Charger

are watching you, you see?

GT versus 440 Magnum

cue that funky jazz hum

this classic chase is on, fan

watch out for the cable car, man

passed the green Beetle twice, boys

both burning black rubber noise

taking air in San Francisco

all eight are off the ground

screaming tires smoking sound

suspension slamming is a test

this sequence is the all-time best

shotgun pellets in GT’s glass

bump and a shove in the shiny ass

black Charger is a dusty launch

into Guadalupe’s gas station— ka-boom!

bad guys all blown up

 

Frank Bullitt 1968

king cool is Steve McQueen

blue eyes bleed intensity

Mustang fastback green

blonde screen idol in his prime

just the uber-action man

doing most of his own stunts

driving hard in old San Fran

 

“High speed pursuit? Two men dead?”

“Where’s Ross?”

“Tell him, that’s an order”

“He’s dead”

“When?”

“Last night. I moved him. He’s downstairs under a John Doe”

“You’re sick”

but he’s got one more lead to follow

 

classy Cathy with her scarf-a

in a little yellow Porsche

giving Frank a hand so

he gets to that hotel in San Mateo

“Miss Simmons’ doesn’t answer”

that’s because she’s dead, sir

“Hello? Del? Yeah, yeah, it’s a strangulation”

more jazzy brass and percussion

 

Jackie’s Cathy is disturbed

and Cathy says—

“I thought I knew you but I’m not so sure anymore

Do you let anything reach you? I mean, really reach you?

Nothing really touchs you

You’re living in a sewer, Frank, day after day”

Frank’s response is so sixties, baby—

“That’s where half of it is. You can’t walk away from it”

Cathy: “Your world is so far from the one I know

What will happen to us in time?”

“Time starts now” —no!

Frank, that’s so sublime

 

big pink Simmons’ suitcases searched

Frank and Del perplexed

no passports and no tickets

but thousands in travelers checks

who is Albert E. Renick?

and Simmons a Dorothy Renick too?

“Get a fingerprint check on Ross”

at the autopsy in blue

Ross is Renick, Renick is Ross

Renick is a used car salesman, boss

“Renick has no record of arrests. He’s clean, Frank”

“You sent us to guard the wrong man, Mr. Chalmers”

 

Frank Bullitt 1968

king cool is Steve McQueen

blue eyes bleed intensity

Mustang fastback green

blonde screen idol in his prime

just the uber-action man

doing most of his own stunts

driving hard in old San Fran

 

“Yeah, well Ross took close to 2 million dollars

from the organization

and he set Renick up

to get the heat off him

and he killed Renick’s wife

to shut her up”

 

busy airport of San Fran

reservations on the seven o’clock flight to Rome

“Do you have a Johnny Ross?” they ask the man

no Ross— he is not boarding, not in this line to Rome

he’s on Pan Am to London

stop it with the phone, folks!

they get it stopped, Ross bolts

and the foot chase is a climax

Ross fires at Bullitt off the tarmacs

then back in the terminal

Ross tries to blend

and shoots a guard

but Bullitt shoots Ross

dead— the end

 

Chalmers has a Lincoln

the bumper sticker’s bright

‘Support Your Local Police’

is a fade out for this night

Frank Bullitt makes it

home at dawn— yawn

he looks at sleeping Cathy

takes off his quick draw holster

Bullitt in his bathroom mirror

seeming troubled somehow

“Time starts now”

 

Frank Bullitt 1968

king cool is Steve McQueen

blue eyes bleed intensity

Mustang fastback green

blonde screen idol in his prime

just the uber-action man

doing most of his own stunts

driving hard in old San Fran

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first kiss

first kiss illicit

parking lot confidential

parked in memory

Posted in haiku cuckoo | Leave a comment

Lulu Belle

kustom sugar is Lulu Belle

Lulu Belle is sweet

chopped her top and low as hell

sweetest girl you’ll ever meet

frenched those headlights, smoothed the nose

but girl still has some chrome

spider caps on her painted toes

and she always takes me home

 

she sure is a bad habit though

that’s gettin’ hard to break

suckin’ all my money

about all that I can make

 

kustom sugar is Lulu Belle

Lulu Belle is shaved

flamin’ lips, a lovely smell

her make-up is flat suede

those lacy cobwebbs are a touch of evil

that fat rear end is slammed

her hips are on a sway bar

a curvy curse, I will be damned

 

she sure is a bad habit though

that’s gettin’ hard to break

suckin’ all my money

about all that I can make

 

Lu likes her new six banger

with its sexy split manifold

dual glass packs make her purr

wide whitewalls make Lu roll

layin’ biased rubber down

smokin’ me a sweet stink

Lulu Belle’s a hopped up sound

and I’m collectin’ slips all pink

 

she sure is a bad habit though

that’s gettin’ hard to break

suckin’ all my money

about all that I can make

 

she steers by sparklin’ moon eye

wearin’ tuck ‘n roll with pride

three-on-the-tree, her lullaby

Lulu is my kustom ride

kustom sugar is Lulu Belle

Lulu Belle is sweet

chopped her top and hot as hell

sweetest girl you’ll ever meet

Posted in kustoms | Leave a comment

Sluggers

Honus was the Dutch

his card’s a pricey job

The Sultan of Swat

Babe, Bambino Ruth

a Georgia Peach, Ty Cobb

Gentleman George is third

Gorgeous .420 in ’22

Hornsby even better

.424, that Rajah dude

Gehrig had them next

Buster, Iron Horse or Lou

Jimmie Foxx equals Double X

Francis, Lefty of O’Doul

Teddy Ballgame of the Sox

was Splendid Splinter too

Stan the Man

of the Cards fan

sent it airborne in St. Lou

Joltin’ Joe DiMaggio

The Yankee Clipper same

Satchel Paige

Josh Gibson

don’t need another name

Jackie broke the barrier tough, son

Hank, he started Hammerin’

the Maris and Mantle race of ’61

M&M Boys just a-slammin’ ’em

then there’s Willie Mays

The Say Hey Kid

but what about poor Shoeless Joe?

did he do what he did?

say it ain’t so, Joe

 

I don’t think so

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Visit to Samsara

violent volcano, Kilauea fuming

lava red; molten, looming

bug-eyed Balinese little ladies

doing the bobblehead

temple pimples popping

in Burmese jungles

are ancient but undead

Ninth Ward mud post-apocalypse

to Versaille’s opulence pristine

old Mursi kings with torn lips

are looking rather mean

ten thousand kicking kung fu kids

scaring the crap out of unity

displaced men mandela making

with international impunity

one grain by one million grains

Tibetan trumpets hum the strains

as young blood robes spin

the prayer wheel

 

red lights one way

white lights that say

L.A.’s freeways frantic

condos with freshwater

swimming pools

overlook shantyshacks

on a ghetto hill

and garbage snacks

in Manila’s landfill

beautiful sewage waterfalls

children working

’til night crawls

alongside bulldozers

at that dump

 

majestic mountain glory peak

dirty glaciers have sprung a leak

exquisite Japanese robot droid

with it’s twitching, soul-less

human void

this perfect geisha girl

sheds two

imperfect tears

the little blonde

mummy boy

has cotton in his ears

fish and banana Ghana

coffins?

buddy’s casket is a gun

spending eternity in

your favorite plastic toy

must be a ton o’ fun

 

body painted villagers

Ethiopian pillagers

carry AK-47’s to the peace pipe

fully developed sex dolls ripe

with adolescent faces

might just be the greatest product

of the eastern, civilized races

mechanical milking

on black and white

spinning carousels

speeds dairy cow depression

seventy-six sows pinned down

for the piglet eating session

chicken run but

chicken can’t hide

get caught up in

the butcher belt ride

 

C.P.D.R.C.

bright orange choreography

population assembly line

Chinese production freaky fine

churning out one billion nine

come on, let’s go

to a sulfur mine

bamboo baskets

on callused shoulders

hauling hissing

golden boulders

up sharp Indo

crunchy pathways

in bare feet

so neat

 

holy, Holy Divino

brace yourself, bambino

for the baptism miraculous

melted veteran sacrifice

N.R.A. family guns look nice

French performance artistry

sums it up so real for me

de Sagazan’s the shape-shifter

madness in his make-up, mister

consciousness attack, a lifter

to the Moksha monster pain

muted, powdered and arcane

but holy shit

he looks insane

 

Namibian desolation discourse

indigo salt pan feels no remorse

white, lonely plate of moon

listen to the monks moan

their lovely, haunting tune

little Asian army ants

wearing yellow shirts

black pants

circling frenzy of

the Mecca trance

one thousand hands

of her Beijing dance

and the Nemrut

goliath heads

have blue, chapped skin

 

red rock arches sing

Petra’s tucked in layering

wheel of life, ever turning

the impermanent sand

mandelas are now

mixed colors

in a cup

like shadows on that dune

repeat a cycle of light

although, that dune is

never the same

 

tall, gray concrete borders

West Bank wall dividers

keep ’em out

keep ’em in

I.D. demanded

smiles remanded

hey, soldier?

can I have my ball back?

(Thanka)

(Thanka)

very much

Posted in prose-ack | 1 Comment

the big stick

the baseball bat is a beautiful thing

even stationary or leaned on waiting

in the batter’s box warming

but in full speed swinging

it’s aerodynamic power is blazing

like a phallic rod of lightning

 

ash, maple or hickory bound

the sweet spot sound

devastates the mound

then it’s dropped to the ground

after the homerun pound

like a phallic-coming crowned

 

bat beauty in turned grains

a weapon of play

for the glory day

using talent and your brains

please don’t be juiced

Sam, don’t be corked

that’s a femme fatale

so swing ’em, Babe

and whack ’em, Cal

kiss ’em like a dame

slug ’em sweet

love ’em honest, Pete

the big stick’s your phallic fame

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excerpt from The Rockwells

“Get a medic up here!” I said into the radio and I gave them our address— “roger, out.”

Anzio was making us sweat, scared shitless. A Kraut machine gun nest had the unit pinned down good. Poor Charlie was screaming and holding his crotch. He’d stepped on a German anti-personel mine, the ones that take your family jewels.

Brack had a look at him. “He’s lost a goddamn nut, Jackie!” he yelled.

“Stop the bleeding and keep quiet, stupid!” I said as the piercing sound of rifle fire echoed in the street.

Brack threw up as he put a field bandage on Charlie’s crotch hole. Poor Charlie, at least still had the other one.

“Psst— Hey, jackass?” It was Rock’s voice from a pile of rubble to my right.

“Yeah?” I hushed back quickly.

“You know where they are?”

“Yeah, about ten yards up on the left… a window, second floor,” I said.

“You got good cover there, Jackie?” He sounded like a quarterback in a huddle.

I looked around. We were dug in pretty good.

“Well, I’m not shot or blowed up yet, Sarge.”

He laughed that classic Rockwell laugh and suddenly there were bullets ricocheting around my ears—

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excerpt from The Rockwells

We were between hell and that hard place— It was like the fourth of July, only with hot steel and giant chunks of earth raining down on us. Then the walls of dust settled. The stench of cordite and burnt flesh filled my nostrils. I was deaf from all the shell bursts and covered in dirt. The guy next to me was missing his head and the trench had collapsed on Polansky. My head was spinning. I threw up on my tunic as my hearing started to come back.

Rock was screaming at me.

“Let’s go, jackass!” and he was up and over—

Posted in The Rockwells | Leave a comment

don’t forget your goggles

don’t forget your goggles

a sandstorm is a-coming

bandanas and surgical masks

will be handy too

you might wear shorts because

blowing sand can feel

nice on the legs

but I’d protect your nipples

if I were you

the sun will still shine

through gritty, yellow clouds

and riding your bicycle

on the flat Nevada road

will be sublime and

otherworldly

maybe even

apocalyptic-like

 

these kids

and their new

desert communes—

 

I

hope

they

have

plenty

of

water

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